This was kind of an interesting topic that came up but in many ways true nonetheless. Now since tomorrow is Valentines Day for many people that means buying gifts for their loved ones or treating them to some kind of excursion and for many that usually means spending a lot of money. One person I was talking to mentioned how his girlfriend pretty much told him what to get her in a â€œfriendly suggestiveâ€ way of course rather than in a â€œdemanding forcefulâ€ way. The sarcasm meter was going through the roof with that. He then started to complain as he mentioned that it costs him more to do this for this one day than it does to buy groceries for the entire month and he just ranted on.
I personally donâ€™t know all of the details such as what they would normally do for each other so itâ€™s kind of hard to say if he is normally very stingy or if she just asks for too much, but I guess everyone hears stories like these all the time. For many people, that â€œItâ€™s the thought that countsâ€ mentality becomes a â€œYou have to do this or else you are selfishâ€ belief. For me, a gift is a gift and as long as there is some kind of significance as to why you gave someone something that is all that should matter. If you have to go into debt to do so then itâ€™s not a really gift but rather a loan of some sort as with that mentality you are probably going to expect the person to give you something of equal value and every special occasion is going to be like a debt collection meeting.
In my opinion, if anyone ever specifically tries to make you feel guilty for not getting them a certain gift there is usually something much deeper that is the problem and spending a lot of money wonâ€™t necessarily fix that. Example, someone demanding that you take them to the most expensive restaurant as a gift could be they feel neglected by you in some way and that this is just an excuse to lash out and so something that doesnâ€™t require as much money such as cooking dinner together at home with no distractions could be the better decision.
For many itâ€™s surprising when they see just how much they spend on gifts for others. Obviously there is nothing wrong with that, but it shouldnâ€™t be an obligation where it would put you into a bad predicament financially.