I was just reading some stories about people who are financially well off or say just won/inherited a lot of wealth and as a result so many people came out of the woodwork such as family members they never knew they had or friends that they have never seen in decades. Of course, they all just happen to need something that requires a lot of money and what a coincidence that they bumped into you huh? When you then imply to them that you can’t really help them because of reasons such as you don’t know them too well they then give you the guilt trip and all that other stuff.
I usually hear this all the time where if say someone has $100,000 saved up then somehow them not wanting to lend/giveaway $7000 to you as you really need it makes them a bad person since it should be too little to do any harm to them. Even if we are talking about a smaller figure here for both parties, it’s just amazing that some people feel that it’s okay or perfectly fine to do so as it is not rude or impolite in anyway. As I mentioned before, I think it is really important that when helping others you also learn to take care of yourself as well. That means learning how to say no as well.
For myself, I love to help people as much as I can, but when it comes to just giving say money because someone asks for it and say knows me a little, I have learned to say no and stood by it. A big reason for this is that I am thinking long term as well because I know if I do it for this one person then it is going to attract a dozen more. Ironically, most of the people that I help by say donating or loaning a lot of money are people that don’t ask for it. For me it comes down to how genuine the person/organization is and whether or not my aid would be actually helping the situation overall as oppose to a quick fix solution that will crack again right away. If the person is say a bad impulse shopper, then I would rather help them with that then say wiping out their credit card debt as I’m not really helping them if I know they will end up in the same place again.
I’m sure everyone has experienced something similar in maybe smaller ways and I just thought this is actually another one of those small things that can easily add up. If you think about it too, you won’t be able to help people anymore if you completely drain yourself and your resources to help others. Think about it from a long term perspective when helping others. If it doesn’t make sense then just learn to say no.
1 Comment